DID GOD MAKE A MISTAKE ??

 

DID GOD MAKE A MISTAKE ?

 

Years ago, when I was serving as a Bishop, I had the privilege of interviewing  two men on different occasions who had in essence the same question- Did God make a mistake?  Let me share their stories.

The 1^st we’ll call Joe.  Joe was married with several small children and a lovely wife.  Both he and his wife were hard workers in the church and in their occupations.  Joe was a good guy with lots of great qualities.  The one challenge he was facing was a same sex attraction.  I admired his candor and his courage.  He didn’t know why he had these feelings, but they were real, and he was tired of fighting it.  We prayed, read scriptures, testified, shed tears and together felt the Lord’s love for him. Ultimately though, he left his wife and children and the church to follow his attractions and I never heard from Joe again.  His wife and children were heart broken but Joe was convinced that in his case, God indeed had made a mistake.

James was a young, handsome, returned missionary.  He too was a good worker in and out of the church.  He was a student and studied hard preparing for a career.  James had a beautiful girl friend and everything seemed to be working for him.  When James met with me, I was surprised to hear that he too was dealing with a same sex attraction and honestly questioned if in his case, God had actually made a mistake.  We prayed, read scriptures,testified, shed tears and together felt the Lord’s love for him.  James ultimately decided that God really hadn’t made a mistake on him.  His feelings were real and difficult to deal with but he remained steadfast.  He kept praying, studying scriptures attending church and living his life keeping the covenants he had made with God and to my knowledge is living a happy and rewarding life.

I’ve thought about these two men from time to time who faced the same question- Did God make a mistake on me?  I’ve pondered their different decisions and have gained insights that might help any of you who might be asking yourselves – In my case, Did God make a mistake?

The 1^st truth we need to review clarifies the nature of God.  2 Samuel 22:31 reminds us that “As for God, his way is perfect.”  Mathew 5:42 challenges us to “be ye therefore perfect even as your Father in Heaven is perfect.” So since God is perfect, we can be reassured that he does NOT make mistakes.  So if God didn’t make a mistake with me and I’m not really a woman in a man’s body or vis versa, why do I still have these feelings?  Let’s review the eternal nature of gender.  That might be a good place to start.  We don’t have to read very far in the Bible, in fact Genesis 1:27 to learn that “God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he them, male and female created he them.”  Note- two genders, male and female is what God created.  The other 10 or so we are aware of today are apparently the creation of someone(s) else, but not of God. He created two. 

The Family- A Proclamation to the World explains that “All human beings- male and female- are created in the image of God.  Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and as such, each has a divine nature and destiny.  Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal and eternal identity and purpose.”  OK so if I was created by God and my gender has always been male or female, why do I have these feelings?

Two insights might help us better understand our feelings.

1-      It’s only natural that we admire God’s creations.  Whether you are male or female, who hasn’t admired another for their physical attributes that you find attractive.

The human body is an amazing thing.  We can admire attributes we find attractive in others without lusting or having sexual desires towards them.  Boys can be attracted to other boys and girls to other girls without involving sexual urgings or activity. In my youth, boys could have close boy friends and girls close girlfriends without of being labeled gay or lesbian, sadly, not so anymore.  It’s ok to have close friends of the same gender and sexuality doesn’t have to even be involved.

2-     We all have human weaknesses.  If same sex attraction is something you deal with, be comforted by Ether 12:27- 

And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness.  I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.”   It’s comforting to know that my weaknesses can become my strengths.

Another truth that I hope helps you is the realization that there are a lot of voices we could listen to, not all are helpful or truthful.  We need to be careful to which voices we chose to listen. Moses 5:26-32 gives  great insight into the importance of who’s voice we listen to and to whom we choose to obey. V-26 tells us that Cain became angry and “listened no more to the voice of the Lord.”  Then v-29 we discover who he did choose to listen to “and Satan said unto Cain…” We know the sad story of Cain who ended up killing his brother Abel by listening to and obeying the wrong voice.

This topic deserves more time than we can give to it here, but should you choose- the church’s web site has some amazing helps on many issues we face today. Thechurchofjesuschrist.org/gospellibrary/lifehelp.  Here you can get insights on topics like- same sex attraction, pornography, transgender and other topics for our day.  The Gospel library app is one we hope you’ll download and get acquainted with.

We end with an Indian legend we were reminded of recently in a sacrament meeting talk. An old wise Indian is counseling with his grandchild and explains that there are two hungry wolves which dwell and fight within every person.  The one is full of hate, anger and evil.  The other full of love, peace and virtue.  The child asks the grandfather- “which one wins the fight?”  the grandfather replies- “that depends on which one you choose to feed.” 

Regardless of the choices others make, we should always treat others with love and respect as Jesus did.  Our prayer is that we can openly discuss difficult topics in a way that offends no one.  That you will be careful as to which voices you choose to listen to and obey. That you will feed the good wolf and that  you will always know that our love for you is unquestioned and unconditional.!

Much Love- 

The Grandparent Chronicles